Brown's plans have left many observers keen to see what happens. Alex Cho, a delegate at the conference said, "It's one thing fixing the economy but it's another thing entirely to remember all the lyrics from Cats."
The content of Brown's speech is intended to focus on crime, public spending cuts and his imaginary adventures as one of the Three Musketeers. One of Brown's aides said, "Throughout his tenure as Prime Minister, Gordon has had a real affinity with Porthos, the cool one, and he wants to tell people about it."
For the second half of his speech, Brown will acknowledge the continued for investment in education. He will follow this by stripping off and taking to a jacuzzi filled up with yoghurt. Pundits predict he will use this opportunity to splash around and shout, "It's like liquid clouds! Clouds! Clouds! So pretty!" Brown will then dry himself off and return to the podium to talk about corporate responsibility.
The dramatic switch by Brown from his normal saturnine disposition is a desperate attempt to try and convince people that he is not a corpse roaming the Earth and turning up in children's nightmares. He will acknowledge the numerous failures of his premiership and attempt to position himself as the underdog for the upcoming election, stating, "I'm a bit sh*t, aren't I?" Pundits predict that this will strike a chord with the voting public when they vote for David Cameron next spring.
