Sun’s fury over child’s letter to Santa

We are in the midst of Christmas season and children are beginning to beg Santa for presents. Some are wishing for X-Boxes, some are wishing for remote control cars and some are wishing that some politician would have the balls to have the conviction to enact social change in spite of corporate interests that stipulate that all of Western society must be born and remain as passive consumers who believe that forever purchasing commodities will provide some temporary happiness rather than having to develop any kind of adult faculties which are necessary to confront the desolate waste of existence, which previous civilisations have engaged with rather than going down the route of deluding itself with Ben Stiller movies.

But the whole nature of Christmas has been thrown into disrepair after the revelation of a child’s letter to Santa. The missive in question detailed the wishes to Santa but has been shown to be replete with mistakes. Father Christmas was dismayed at the lack of spelling and grammar in the letter sent to him. In a special report, the Sun newspaper reported the scandal as “Kidz Take Santa 4 A Wanka”. The letter which has been posted in the newspaper, reveals the level of ineptitude including such errors as “I waana ponee and sheeut.”

Editor of the Sun Dominic Lackey said, “We are doing are duty as highlighting the abuse that someone like Father Christmas suffers in a way that boosts our sales. No-one like Santa who helps all those that have been nice should ever have to suffer non-coverage in our paper.”

Father Christmas said, “She just got some spelling wrong, who gives a sheeut?”